I Hate it Here

I think Boston must have spoiled me, either that or this truly is as damnable a region of the country as I ofttimes believe it to be. I went through my usual day off routine today, got up around 9am (on Saturday it’s 10) made myself a small breakfast of waffles, bacon, apple cider, and coffee, watched the episode of “Best Week Ever” that I had recorded Friday (on Saturday it’s The Soup, and then did a bit of nothing for a while. This weeks nothing was playing the last few levels of Prey, a game I’ve been playing on and off for what sadly amounts of a couple years now. I say sadly because at the place where I originally left off in the game, I could have beaten it in just a few more hours, but those few hours ended up spanning almost 2 years. Whatever. After Prey I set about figuring out what I wanted to do today. I had thought yesterday that I might go into Georgetown and get my comics at the Big Planet Comics there, then walk around a bit, but when I woke up today the weather really wasn’t what I wanted to walk around in. Not that the weather was bad, it was just humid and overcast, and not really inspiring me to go out of my way to head over to Georgetown. After about an hour or lazing around and doing a bit more nothing I decided to go to the Big Planet over in Vienna instead, if I was feeling bored enough (which I was) I could take the long drive home via Route 7 as opposed to getting back onto the beltway. That would end up being my day, I’d come home afterwards and read some comics, maybe play some Day of Defeat or watch a little TV, eat, call the folks in Connecticut, and go to sleep after watching Adult Swim on the Cartoon Network. Very much my typical “full day off” weekend day and honestly, it always leave me feeling like I’m missing out on something.

On days like today I can’t help comparing my experience living here to that of living in Boston, seeing as how I lived there for the better part of 10 years during and after college and just prior to moving here. Were I to have the same type of work in Boston and encounter the same type of day with the same goals (buying my comics for the week/month) what would be different?

Let’s assume the idealized situation, let’s assume it’s a nice day where I want to be outside and take a bit of a walk. And let’s assume I’ve living at my last apartment in Boston on Centre Street in Jamaica Plain, a bit removed but still close enough to the city. I’d leave the apartment and catch the 39 bus on Centre Street heading towards Boston. It would take roughly 20-30 minutes depending on the traffic to get over near Mass Art. It’s a nice day so I decide to cut through the Fens on the way to Comicopia over on Commonwealth Ave. I hit Comicopia, one of (if not) the best comic book stores in the country, and grab by books for the week/month and then head on over to Newbury Comics (more music and DVD’s than comics really) on Newbury street. I’m not necessarily looking for anything at Newbury comics, but I always have a list of CD’s to buy and they’ve got great prices, new releases are $12 max and they always have a display of $10 CD’s that are never just crap they’re trying to get rid of. I discovered The Decemberists, Cursive, and Neutral Milk Hotel all for $10 on that rack in the past. After Newbury comics I hit Spin City to browse used CD’s and then get on my way.

I could do several things at this point if I wanted to go for a walk: I could walk down Newbury street (passing boutiques, galleries, various shops, and a TON on people on the way) to the Public Gardens and through there to the Boston Commons where I might grab a park bench and read some of my comics. I could then swing back down Bolyston until I got to Back Bay where I could catch the bus back to Jamaica Plain. I could also just walk down Mass Ave. from Newbury street, take a right down Huntington, visit my old college stomping grounds and then catch the 39 again near Brigham Circle just past Mass Art. Or I could head up Mass Ave. towards Cambridge and talk a walk across the Mass Ave. Bridge, a breezy walk with a great view of Boston on one side, Cambridge and MIT on the other, and the Charles River below. On the other side of the bridge I’d take a right down Memorial Drive and continue towards the Longfellow Bridge. The Longfellow Bridge takes me to the esplanade, the long strip of parkland that runs between the Longfellow and Mass Ave. bridges on the Boston side of the Charles. This is another great place to stop and read in the shade, by the river, or one of the ponds along the esplanade. Once I get back to Mass Ave. I head towards Huntington where I can catch the bus back home.

That trip has accomplished several things: 1) Buying Comics, 2) Looking for cheap CD’s, 3) Taking a walk, 4) enjoying the presence of other people and nature. All told the total distance traveled is about 11.50 miles, about 6-7 miles walking.

Were I to attempt the same thing in DC the story would be different. The targets would be Big Planet Comics in Georgetown, which I must say is at least 90% as well stocked as Comicopia, Smash City Records in Adams Morgan, which is not as well stocked as Newbury comics and where I’m not likely to find anything under $14, and then a walk around the reflecting pool. My initial mode of transport is driving into Georgetown. Total distance traveled: 37 miles, about 7-8 miles walking. So the walking time isn’t that much difference, granted in Boston, the major points of interest are all very close to each other and the actual “walking” part is where most of the walking is done, but still it’s the distance and time to even get where these things are at that’s insane and I live relatively close.

Where in Boston, this day out is a casual day in the city, here, it’s a project, so I hope it makes sense that less than perfect weather sours me to the idea of making this trek. And honestly, I probably wouldn’t even hit Smash City after Big Planet, simply because Smash City and the nearby Crooked Beat stores don’t have a wide selection. I’ll find something there every now and then, but not with the ease of Newbury Comics. Maybe I’m just not familiar with DC, maybe I still live too far away, or maybe I’m just spoiled after having lived in a city where almost everything you’d ever want to see and do is within a 5 miles radius of everything else. Whatever the case, I think I’ve tried and it all comes down to one thing: I Hate it Here.

Buried Treasure

My parents came to visit from Connecticut today. And since they’re cleaning out their old house – the house I grew up in – in order to eventually sell it, my Dad brought a ton of stuff from my old room. There must be 12 boxes at least. A quarter of them would seem to contain long-forgotten comics and magazines, but the rest are relics from the past, the buried treasures of my life a decade and more behind me.

I want to go through them all right now, to explore the past, but I know I would be up until the wee hours reliving a bygone era. There’s also some Star Wars thing on the History Channel right now, something I’ve seen before, but that nonetheless rekindles my desire to view the trilogy again. And meanwhile I’ve ventured onto Ok Cupid. I’m a retard when it comes to real world dating and I’m a retard with internet dating as well. I tend to wait for people to contact me, but I’m looking at profiles as if I’m going to contact them first myself. I think the problem I have with contacting people first is that it’s too much control. I want a certain measure of fate in my romantic encounters. If I just get to choose from a list, it sort of takes the adventure out of it. Then again, in my experience, the adventure tends to me whether or not I ever get to meet the person I’m talking to online, or whether they flake out on me without notice.

I’ve been thinking about Carrie at work as well. There is and obvious attraction between us, but I can’t shake the feeling that any relationship that could possibly develop would be doomed. I’m so friggin’ busy with work though that going out with someone who works at the same place I do does have a certain logic to it. I honestly don’t know what to do and I probably don’t have the time for any type of relationship, but I have this unstoppable compulsion to seek out relationships. Maybe I’m just trying to recapture the past. It’s been over 6 years since the end of my last decent relationship, the same time my last job in the game industry ended and my life went spiraling into a dismal abyss of despair. I think maybe that since I have a game industry job again I’m looking for that last piece of the puzzle, the decent relationship. Maybe I think if I can put my life together the same way it was before, just with different pieces, that maybe I can feel good about things again. I could just be trying to convince myself that I’m not clinically depressed however and have been for 6 years. I’m the kind of person who has to exhaust all possibilities before coming to any life-altering conclusions however.

But whatever, my apartment is the cleanest it’s been in months, I have some Cinnabon sticks in the kitchen, I’m off work until tuesday, and there is a veritable trove of treasures from my naive youth in my living room closet. That’s good enough for now.